Shutting Up

Let's face it, we all like to moralise from time to time, and reflect upon how we're better than others. I personally indulge in a good daily commentary, and sometimes I like to go out to a local dive or eatery with the wifey or friends and neighbors where we pass a few parsimonious reflections on the actions and lives of others. Self-righteous moralising can be a fun, and healthy activity, and it doesn't harm anyone. Right? (You're doing it right now - aren't you!)

I may have even ranted about you, reading this blog, as was passed and exchanged the hospitable "Hi-Ho." Or maybe you as in the generic, all encompasssing "You" who represents some irritating portion of society. Nothing personal. Besides, you've done it. You do it. You'll do it tomorrow before the cock crows that third time. But what sort of effect could moralising have on other people if done in excess...and even more - to their face?

Those of us wearing the high ranking parent badge need to learn that the cumulative effect of our lectures and homilies on the offspring could be particularly devastating.

Imagine for a moment a being of momentous stature with complete physical and emotional control over your every whim. It blocks out the sun with a giant wagging phalangeal and a nasty smirk. This sinister mouthaholic is somewhere between 10 and 20 feet tall, weighing half a ton and can't find a cork large enough to stop the overflow of guilt, criticism, and toxic whinning which responds to various acts of genuine misbehavior or honest accident...either will do.

If children had any real legal rights....well, I suppose they do actually have a quite a few justly deserved provisions on the books. What I mean to say is... if they knew how to use them in front of a magistrate...they would file numerous complaints and restraining orders against their very own Maw and Paw for the threatening and humiliating mistreatment received over a simple irritational act or slothful response.

Studies have shown that:

- Nine out of ten children whose parent/s have passed judgement or made pious reflections, at length, in the home or in public, have turned into sanctimonious bigots....and Mom and Pop look daft in the process.

- 66 per cent, or two thirds, of adults who currently experience depression or other mental illnesses, do so as a result of an early encounter with a parent or guardian with a sermonising habit.

Now is the time! Let us wash our hands of this useless acquired pattern of behavior. They say the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem...

...Hi, my name's Ivan (Hi Ivan), and I'm a sermonizer.

Ivan L