Sunday, August 1, 2010

Urban Dog Walking Etiquette

Me, the family, and the pets (yes - we consider the pets a part of the family) just moved from our small town to the big city. Literally, thousands to millions in population. One of the many adjustments we are making is not having a fenced in yard for the mongrels. They are, at least for now, becoming inside pets. No fenced yard also means they must be officially walked multiple times each day. This public walking in our new big city neighborhood has held a learning curb for all of us. Multiple lessons have been learned.

For example what can and can't wear to walk the dogs early in the morning? Do boxers, pajama pants, and bed head make us look like friendly new neighbors or a bit red? Is it appropriate to start up a conversation with others spelling their critters or is this more of a male urinal concept - eyes forward or head down and no talking? And what about the poop?

Here are a few perfectly sensible if not practical rules I have created with a month of experience under our collars.

#1 - Multiple or larger dogs get the right of way.

Never play sidewalk chicken with a Great Dane or Mastiff. It's just like driving and a semi is turning thru your intersection and needs you to back up so their big load can get by. It may irritate you, but you know you'll always move.

Multiple dogs guided by a single walker or multiple walkers with multiple dogs also get right of way. Trust me, 3 Maltese and a basset hound can send a message.

The polite response is to move to the other side of the road or path.

#2 - Poop remediation is trickier than it looks...and more disgusting.

Picking up your pets poop is a humbling experience. It provides a substantial amount of reflection on the whole idea of pet ownership. I find myself wondering if my love for these family members equals bending over and digging out chunks of steaming feces
from monkey grass with a thin plastic grocery bag. I'll let you know when I have an answer.

What's acceptable:

IF a dog poops in the forest and no one is there to hear it - it does NOT make a sound! If it's dark and no one is looking - all removal bets are off.

If your dog has a bad case of diarrhea...just keep walking. If you can find a large stick or rock or hub cap to cover the potential shit shoe danger, great. IF not, don't look back.

Attempt to have your pets using the demilitarized zone between the street and the sidewalk. The yard is sacred ground - avoid it if possible.

Urine is OK anywhere. In fact, I find it enviable that our pets can do this in public but if the owner does its public indecency and classified a misdemeanor - bearing with it probation and a hefty little fine....at least, that's what I have heard.

What's NOT acceptable:

Avoid clear poop bags. AT first this seemed like a fine idea to recycle those few extra used zip locks. Actually, it just not something you really want to see first hand.

Happy Trails,

Ivan L

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